FET

And So It Begins

~ Girlmom ~ 1 Comment

6 estrogen patches did the trick, my lining jumped from a 6 to a 10. The time has come.

We met with Dr. Garzo in his office and with my stomach in a knot we looked over our embryos. We have 1 good, 7 fair and 1 poor embryo to choose from, we went with the obvious choice.

IMG_1297

We scheduled our transfer for next Wednesday. It’s hard for me to wrap my head around this. I start Progesterone injections, prednisone and doxycyclin tomorrow. I continue the estrogen patches as is and if I get a BFP{big fat positive} then I will continue the PIO {progesterone} injections and the stupid patches through week 9 of my pregnancy. ARE YOU FREAKING SERIOUS?

IMG_1299

I hated the progesterone injections last time. THEY HURT! But at least last time Shane was local and able to give them to me. This time I am going to have to put on a brave face and do them myself when he’s gone. This is stressing me out. I can’t wait to show you the needle.

Here’s the plan. I show up at the Dr. an hour before our transfer time on Wednesday. I sit and drink water as instructed and take my valium when they tell me to. Then I get prepped for the transfer and Dr. Garzo will attempt to knock me up. I will have a blood test 11 days later. All the while I have to stick a long ass needle in my gluteus maximus every.damn.night.

Is she done complaining yet?

I am cautiously nervous about this. The excitement I felt last time has been replaced with memories and I can’t help that. So, no need to tell me “this time it will be a breeze” because I know that it probably will be but if you know me, I worry. It makes me sad and frustrated that I have to go through all this shit to have a baby. I don’t want to give myself shots and I don’t want to pay 100+ dollars for each box of 16 patches, I change 6 of those damn things every 3 days {and that is if they all actually stay on} Never happens. 

You know you’re going through infertility when your phone log looks like this.
photo

It’s not fair and I don’t want to….pity party for 1.

I am done. We can continue this next week.

In Case You were Wondering

~ Girlmom ~ Leave a comment

I haven’t forgotten to tell you how my Dr. appointment went, it’s just nothing really happened. My lining is at a 6, they like to see it at an 8, if that means anything to you. I now have 6, yes 6 birth control patches decorating my lower abdomen. Side effects? You betcha!  Headaches, breast tenderness, and bitchiness. Those are the side effects for 1 patch, so multiply it by 6 and that’s how I have been feeling.

Shane escorted me to my appointment to sign my life away  our procedure consents. Along with with our FET they will also be doing something called assisted hatching, not sure how I feel about this yet but it’s supposed to raise implantation success, but it can also split the embryo resulting in identical twins <— not a joke.

Once again I will be on those wonderful PIO {progesterone} injections. This gives me a knot in my stomach to think about so lets not talk about it yet, mmmkay?

Next appointment is Thursday morning, my optimism tells me my lining will be good and we will schedule the transfer day.

Tomorrow, the wheelchair tennis masters starts in Mission Viejo. David plays everyday starting Tuesday, twice a day starting Thursday. Do yourself a favor and catch a match if you can. We will be heading up Friday morning for sure, I am still debating on taking Kaili up solo before then.

Don’t Take This The Wrong Way

~ Girlmom ~ Leave a comment

I’m about to bitch, complain and worry. Ready, set, go!

I thought these estrogen patches were going to be a breeze to deal with, however now I think poking myself with a needle twice a day would be easier.

1. They are expensive.

2. They don’t stay on. I am supposed to change them every 3 days but they are falling off daily.

3. My stomach looks like a tar pit.

4. Did I mention they don’t stay on? So now I need a refill and it’s only been a week. Bullshit.

Now I have 4 damn patches taped to my stomach so I can hopefully keep them on until tomorrow. Yipee!

This whole experience is completely different than the first. Now don’t take this the wrong way but I am not concerned about getting pregnant. I feel confident that we will get a BFP on the first try. Is this foolish? Am I over confident? Will I eat my words and feel like a shit head? Maybe. I am older, so maybe my positivity is arrogant.

Getting pregnant isn’t my worry, being pregnant is. This time I am really worried about all the what if’s that weren’t even an after thought the first time. I know, I know, don’t say it. “This time will be so much easier”. “How can it be any worse?” Let me count the ways. Yes it can be worse. This time I have a 2 year old. It can be worse and I am scared. There, I said it. Judge away.

Worst Day Ever For a Dr. Appointment.

~ Girlmom ~ 2 Comments

The one day, ONE DAY I don’t give myself extra time to get the the Dr. all hell breaks loose in La Jolla. Three accidents surrounding the one place I needed to be. One was a biggy and closed down the main street in all directions. One was in the intersection of the hospital entrance, so no one could even get into that area and the third one closed the entrance to highway 5, down the road. So I sat with all the other cars for a good 45 minutes until they sorted it out.

IMG_0720

Made it into the office one hour late, sat in the room and waited another 20 minutes, why are there so many infertile people? Then once he came in, it was a wham bam thank ya ma’am sort of thing.  One quick ultrasound and 3 minutes later he was gone with the wind. So. Awesome.

Who reads this?
Who reads this?

So how did it go? Good! No cysts, “carry on good sir“. Next Friday is a big appointment. Shane must come with to sign papers, they will check my lining and if it looks good then we “should” be able to schedule the BIG day. The nurse said anywhere from 5-14 days later.

“Rules, there are no rules!!” I don’t have any restrictions until after the transfer. “Party on Wayne“.

Actually, It’s my coffee that I can’t live without, am really worried about stopping. If you were reading this blog from the beginning than you might remember  how bad my headaches were in the beginning of round one. We never did figure out if it was caffeine withdrawals or the Lupron injections.

I also had an estrogen blood draw to see how my levels are. I will add 2 patches if my estrogen is low or remove a patch if it’s too high, I think I can handle that.

I've had a many of these. Blood draws and code receipts.
I’ve had a many of these. Blood draws and code receipts.

By the time this was all said and done I was running late to pick up Kaili. That one big accident was still detouring traffic so it took me awhile to get to her school. However, after all my bitching I don’t want to seem heartless. My problems are nothing compared to whomever was in that vehicle and their family,so even though I was pulling my hair out and cursing myself for not leaving earlier, things could be worse. I am not blind to that.