Pregnancy

The New Year

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2013 has come and gone, just like my youth. I fell asleep on the couch before 9:00 pm on New Years eve. What can I say, growing a human being is exhausting. I woke up feeling awful, nauseous, headache…basically a hangover without the fun. I felt like crud the entire day. Happy new year.

Luckily with Shane’s help we were able to get a meal in the crockpot. We tried Jimmy Fallon’s Crock-Pot Chili and I’d say we all gave it 2 thumbs up. I think it’s safe to use the entire habanero chili but I kept to the recipe for K’s sake. Slowly she will be able to tolerate the spicy like her mom and dad.

Chili + cornbread for the kid
Chili + cornbread for the kid

It’s hard to get excited for the new year, it’s basically an extension of 2013. If this subchorionic bleed continues to be a problem then I don’t have much to look forward to other than watching life go by from my couch. If this pregnancy mimics my last one then I can’t really plan on doing much at all. I know save the sob story until we know the facts. It’s just hard to get excited about much, I am envious of all those pregnant ladies out there doing stuff. No resolution, no plans at all, bring it on 2014.

9 Weeks

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9 weeks, wasn’t that a racy movie with Kim Basinger? A lifetime  ago I was meant to watch that movie on a very unsuccessful first date. Hashtag awkward.

I haven’t had much to write about since I have been housebound for what seems like forever. Christmas was nice but it always seems overwhelming, maybe it’s because I haven’t been doing much other than sitting at home. I think a quiet Christmas in Hawaii or Mexico sounds pretty good, although getting there with a 3 year old and a baby doesn’t seem so great. Somehow I think sitting with my feet in the water with an adult beverage may help ease that pain. Shane’s birthday always gets lost in the holiday so it would be nice to have a low key Christmas and focus more on his birthday, although he says he doesn’t really care. Anyhow we have 363 days to plan something or nothing.

Kaili seemed to enjoy herself and is getting good use out of her new toys.

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My Tuesday ultrasound was rescheduled twice. I have still been spotting/lightly bleeding on and off, I finally head to the Dr. in a few hours where hopefully they can assure me that everything looks fine. I will also have my blood drawn and if my levels look good I can stop all my meds, hell to the yes! 

Just Words

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I am not sure if the B6 is actually helping with the nausea but it is giving me some much needed energy. I cheated and had a small cup of coffee the other day and oh boy did it taste good and I felt like a champ most of the day, in between the moments of wanting to barf. Tea has been hard to drink so I am counting down the days until I allow myself a morning cup of joe.

I thought things were beginning to look up, emotionally I have been feeling a lot better and physically I hadn’t had any cramping or spotting but unfortunately it started up again this morning. I didn’t think I was doing too much but I guess I was…aggravating, depressing, I can think of a lot of words to describe my feelings. My transfer was November 13th so basically I have been on moderate bed rest for over a month. Who saw this coming?

I will leave you with a few Kaili pictures because I’ve got a date with Top Chef.

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No Fun At 7 Weeks

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The past few days have been rough for me. Not only have I had morning sickness most of the day but the cramping and spotting comes back when I am on my feet too much. And I am not talking longs walks, or an hour at the gym, I am talking just getting up and down waiting on Kaili. Everyday errands and what not seem to be too much for my body to handle. The nurse said I have to put myself on bed rest once this happens. Pity party for one please.  I was really hoping to be able to work out through this pregnancy, it makes me feel low, anxious and irritable that I can’t do much and I am only 7 weeks. When does this get better?

Saturday was a hard one, I couldn’t stop dwelling on the fact that maybe my body isn’t meant for this whole pregnancy thing. I can’t keep up with Kaili who wants to go to SeaWorld and the park and that makes me feel so guilty. I have to get myself through the next week without Shane then he is home for 2 weeks, thankfully.

After feeling sorry for myself, I got up and made these Korean BBQ lettuce wraps. Then we drove down the street to check out some super duper Christmas lights, Kaili really got a kick out of it.

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On a positive note, I’ve read that B6 can help with nausea so I will be heading out to grab a bottle of vitamins and the weather is supposed to be gorgeous for a few days. Maybe I can come out of this week with a tan?

What A Difference

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What a difference 5 days makes. Here is my ultrasound picture from Friday.

6 weeks
6 weeks

Here is my ultrasound picture from yesterday.

6 weeks 5 days
6 weeks 5 days

We have a fetus and it has a heartbeat.

You can all rest easy now.

Phew is all I have to say. Now I just have to get past the first trimester right? I am still on restrictions with no end date, probably until my OB gives me the O.K.

I continue all my meds until 9 weeks and I know there is no way that I have enough here at home to get me through the next 3 weeks so you know what that means… $$$ Cha-Ching!!

My next and probably last appointment with Reproductive Partners is on Christmas Eve and unfortunately it won’t be with Dr. Garzo, sigh. But on the up side so far there is no sign of a subchorionic tear and hopefully there will be no sign of one. Can I get an AMEN?

Alright friends we did it. Thank you for all your support, only 34 weeks and 1 day to go. Well probably not even that long since I will be having a C-section. Hmm that makes her <—-{see what I did there? It just came out that way} August due date a July due date. What star sign would that be?

Thoughts at 6 Weeks

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Did I tell you that someone called me a “fertile myrtle” after I told them the FET worked? That stuck with me all day. 6 years of trying to get pregnant the “old fashioned” way and I have never even had a hint of a late period. I think it’s funny how peoples views can be so skewed if they don’t know the whole story.

Last week I started having some cramping along with spotting. I called the nurse and she assured me it was completely normal, I won’t lie it was scary. This continued for a few days, Thursday night being the worst but knowing I had my ultrasound Friday was keeping me sane.

Since I blogged through my pregnancy with Kaili I have been able to go back and compare dates and symptoms. I thought this would be a good thing but maybe it’s not.

I forgot when I made my ultrasound and blood draw for Friday that it was going to be with another doctor, Garzo was out of town. The first thing he asked me was how I was feeling and I told him about the cramping and spotting. Once he was preforming the ultrasound he asked me if I have ever miscarried before. That question put a bad tone to my whole day. He showed us the gestational sac but said it was a few days too early to see the fetus. I know it’s not too early because at my 6 week appt. with Kaili we saw the fetus and her heartbeat. I was in a fog the rest of the morning. Thinking back on everything, questioning why, and quite honestly freaking out. They scheduled my next ultrasound for Friday aka 7 weeks. I called the office back a few hours later asking if I could come in earlier, since the doctor said a heartbeat should be detected at 6 weeks 3 days, I didn’t want to drive myself crazy for another week.

I do know 6 weeks can be too early and I do know cramping and spotting can be normal and that my progesterone level being low can also be normal but it can also not be normal. I went into this expecting the worst, hoping for the best. After having a serious one on one talk with myself, I do think everything is fine. My pregnancy symptoms are strong, I have the nose of a bloodhound that can sniff out last nights meal on a stranger walking past me, I have days where I feel like I have narcolepsy and could fall asleep standing up and I have been nauseous  at the strangest of times mostly at 1-3 A.m. I am sure everything is just fine . This process is hard, emotional, frustrating and stressful.
I have been put on modified bed rest until a heartbeat is detected, my next ultrasound is Wednesday. 

Until then, go Hawks! #louder

Not So Merry

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This whole “Santa’s watching” threat is turning out to be a genius idea. Hopefully Elf on the Shelf is still a thing next year because I will be all over that sh*t.

Yesterday was the first day that I have felt like crud the entire day. If I could have stayed under layers of blankets and slept sun up to sun down I would have. I mustered up enough energy to take K to see Santa. We had talked about it, we have been reading books about Christmas and she knows he is watching her…kind of spooky actually. She was pretty excited about it until he started walking toward us waiting at his “cottage.” She stiffened up, grabbed ahold of me and jumped into her stroller. Scary Santa was on his way and she wasn’t digging it. It’s a lot harder to not pick her up than one might imagine. Our time came for pictures and she walked up to him holding my hand but when it was picture time she about lost it. She was trying hard not to cry, which came close to breaking my heart but once her feet were safely planted on the ground she was fine and breaking into his stash of candy canes.

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This one is my favorite.

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After that exhausting morning we went home for a much needed nap. Hours later I peeled myself off the bed to grab a few things at Target. Wandering around dizzy and nauseous I realized somewhere along the way K had taken off her shoes and apparently chucked one to Never Never Land because it’s gone. I walked all over that damn store and checked with customer service and no one had seen one lonely shoe laying in an aisle. Who knows, she probably put it on the shelf next to the Chips Ahoy when she was dropping boxes of cookies into the cart.

Let’s Give Thanks

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I am having more side effects this time around. My face seems to break out more and more each day, I don’t know if it’s the pregnancy or the 6 birth control patches on my stomach…or both. I am ready to be done with them. I am super itchy and sneezy, part of me wonders if I have a mild allergy to something I am taking. I am not sleeping great but can’t seem to keep my eyes open past 9:00pm. I visit the bathroom 2-5 times a night already and get really thirsty out of the blue so I must have water within reach at all times.

Ok, enough with my whining…whine= wine..which I would like a glass of….

Tuesday I picked up my in-laws at John Wayne airport. After some Thanksgiving day grocery shopping we took them to Sushi Deli down the road for some non-Walla Walla food. Kaili devoured the entire bowl of garlic edamame, ate the crust off the calamari and dove head first into the rice. She just discovered soy sauce and  would probably drink it if we allowed her to.

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We spent part of yesterday morning at SeaWorld, we all had passes so we didn’t feeling guilty once we saw what we wanted and split. AKA  2 hours later. They have the Christmas season going on complete with Santa and his reindeer.

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Kaili was happy to see Penny Penguin…

Kaili was happy to see Penny Penguin

But when Shamu creeped up on her she was over it and ran away.

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After a big lunch we took a walk to the store to pick up all things forgetten from yesterdays trip. I spent the evening baking. The amount of food we will have tomorrow is nauseating. But eating until we make ourselves sick and then killing someone over a T.V. on black Friday is what the USA is all about, am I right?

I am thankful for our baby maker Dr. Garzo, without him our hearts and home would be empty. I am thankful for my husband who works so hard to give us a nice life and pays the good doctor the big bucks to knock me up. I am thankful for my daughter who has shown me what true love really is and makes me smile every time I look at her.

Except  when she is being a little brat.

What are you thankful for?

Wishing you all a very happy Thanksgiving!