One Last Day

Remember when I got my bag of goodies last week? Needles, Progesterone, alcohol swabs?

I was dreading, no seriously dreading the first injection. But, it wasn’t bad. At all.

Shane has been giving me them since Friday and he has gotten really good at it, I don’t feel a thing.

Then Monday rolled around and I couldn’t shake the fact that I was going to have to give myself the shot. I so over reacted, imagine that. I mean there is nothing fun with jabbing yourself with a big ass needle but it’s totally doable, I didn’t faint, cry or even whimper. Winning! The worst part is the the aftermath. I am left with sore bruises  dotting my booty and hips. Maybe I am doing something wrong? Human pincushion.

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Today is my transfer day. I don’t have any real emotions about it, I’m not nervous or worried, it’s just what it is, going to the dr. to get knocked up…hopefully.

I will tell you all about it. I mean what else am I going to do in bed for 48 hours?

And So It Begins

6 estrogen patches did the trick, my lining jumped from a 6 to a 10. The time has come.

We met with Dr. Garzo in his office and with my stomach in a knot we looked over our embryos. We have 1 good, 7 fair and 1 poor embryo to choose from, we went with the obvious choice.

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We scheduled our transfer for next Wednesday. It’s hard for me to wrap my head around this. I start Progesterone injections, prednisone and doxycyclin tomorrow. I continue the estrogen patches as is and if I get a BFP{big fat positive} then I will continue the PIO {progesterone} injections and the stupid patches through week 9 of my pregnancy. ARE YOU FREAKING SERIOUS?

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I hated the progesterone injections last time. THEY HURT! But at least last time Shane was local and able to give them to me. This time I am going to have to put on a brave face and do them myself when he’s gone. This is stressing me out. I can’t wait to show you the needle.

Here’s the plan. I show up at the Dr. an hour before our transfer time on Wednesday. I sit and drink water as instructed and take my valium when they tell me to. Then I get prepped for the transfer and Dr. Garzo will attempt to knock me up. I will have a blood test 11 days later. All the while I have to stick a long ass needle in my gluteus maximus every.damn.night.

Is she done complaining yet?

I am cautiously nervous about this. The excitement I felt last time has been replaced with memories and I can’t help that. So, no need to tell me “this time it will be a breeze” because I know that it probably will be but if you know me, I worry. It makes me sad and frustrated that I have to go through all this shit to have a baby. I don’t want to give myself shots and I don’t want to pay 100+ dollars for each box of 16 patches, I change 6 of those damn things every 3 days {and that is if they all actually stay on} Never happens. 

You know you’re going through infertility when your phone log looks like this.
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It’s not fair and I don’t want to….pity party for 1.

I am done. We can continue this next week.