So this has been floating around Facebook.
Funny right? I thought so, then after a few minutes I wanted to comment on the picture and ask them if they wanted to give us some money for all our “catching” doctor visits.
I didn’t, just so you know. I am well aware that the general population has limited interest in my reproductive history. But what can I say, I lost my gynecological shame years ago. Infertilty can turn a woman brazen, hell I will pretty much open my legs for anyone in a white coat.
What the hell did she just say?
I thought about posting this.
I didn’t, just so you know.
24 weeks pregnant = 6 months right? I am pretty sure but I’ve never been good at math. For the most part I am feeling pretty good. I have been getting some more contractions and some side and back pain when I am on my feet for awhile. . But it goes away when I put my feet up so that’s good. I am finding it harder to keep my balance while working out but I haven’t fallen over in front of anyone yet.Other than that not much has changed.
I am eager for my next ultrasound to check on the previa, if the Dr. could lift my pelvic rest restrictions, that would be great. Also if they could confirm that these contractions aren’t doing any harm that would help ease my mind.
Only a kajillion days to go.
I’m about to bitch, complain and worry. Ready, set, go!
I thought these estrogen patches were going to be a breeze to deal with, however now I think poking myself with a needle twice a day would be easier.
1. They are expensive.
2. They don’t stay on. I am supposed to change them every 3 days but they are falling off daily.
3. My stomach looks like a tar pit.
4. Did I mention they don’t stay on? So now I need a refill and it’s only been a week. Bullshit.
Now I have 4 damn patches taped to my stomach so I can hopefully keep them on until tomorrow. Yipee!
This whole experience is completely different than the first. Now don’t take this the wrong way but I am not concerned about getting pregnant. I feel confident that we will get a BFP on the first try. Is this foolish? Am I over confident? Will I eat my words and feel like a shit head? Maybe. I am older, so maybe my positivity is arrogant.
Getting pregnant isn’t my worry, being pregnant is. This time I am really worried about all the what if’s that weren’t even an after thought the first time. I know, I know, don’t say it. “This time will be so much easier”. “How can it be any worse?” Let me count the ways. Yes it can be worse. This time I have a 2 year old. It can be worse and I am scared. There, I said it. Judge away.
Today I am 6 weeks! This morning was our first ultrasound and we were able to see the little “nubs’ along with the heartbeat! Such a great feeling! Dr. Garzo said all the measurements were perfect and to come back in 2 weeks. That will be my last appointment with Reproductive Partners. Kind of sad! I am “graduating” to my OBGYN. Kind of exciting!
I am still lucky enough to say I haven’t had any morning sickness so far, just drowsiness and dizziness. I heard somewhere that when a women get’s bad morning sickness and sore breasts it’s because the Progesterone and Estrogen levels are low. Who knows if that true or not but if my levels stay good then maybe I will soar through without any bad “side effects”. I hope I didn’t just jinx myself!
Tomorrow is Shane and my 4th Anniversary…What a great gift we have been given! We are headed downtown to try chef Brian Malarkey’s new restaurant Friday. Very eager for that!
I am noticing some of the side effects from the cocktail of meds I am taking. The past 2 days have been hard. I have had a headache since yesterday morning, I am drowsy and pretty emotional. Some of this may be due to my caffeine withdrawals but I sure hope it gets better. I can’t imagine feeling like this for another week and a half!
I have planned out the next week, from dinners to workouts and the hubs and I are going to try a new yoga/stretch class at the Y. Hopefully all of it together will help if I do continue to feel poopy!
On the first day of my cycle I was told to call my nurse and schedule an appointment for my baseline ultrasound and labs for the 3rd day of my cycle. That was today. What is a baseline appointment you ask? The Dr. checked to make sure I didn’t have any cysts on my ovary and that my uterine lining looked good. I was given a thumbs up and the go ahead! Next they drew blood to check my FSH, Estradiol and DHEA levels. Can’t really tell you what they all are but if any levels are too high or too low they can adjust them with more meds…lucky me! I was also given a big box of Lupron and some birth control pills. The bcp are essentially going to help the Dr. take charge of my cycle. Once I am on the bcp for 1 week I will start the Lupron injections subcutaneously every morning until the egg retrieval. Lupron is used to suppress ovulation. Once I stop the bcp in about 2 weeks I will get another period. Once that happens we will go in for another ultrasound, blood draw and a lesson on how Shane gets to stick me with needles everyday. My nurse said I don’t have to cut out caffeine, herbal supplements and alcohol intake until I start the stimulation meds oh and no more hot tub for me after that either! So I have a few more weeks with my vices before I go without them for 10 months..fingers crossed!
I have made the decision to take the time to document our journey with IVF. IVF is short for In Vitro Fertilization, a fertility treatment where eggs are fertilized by sperm outside the womb. There are many different reasons a couple may need to go this route. Our story goes like this…the Mr. and I have been married 3 1/2 years and trying for baby for about 2 1/2 years. After a lot of Dr. appointments and such we learned that the Mr.’s sperm morphology ( the shape ) isn’t great. Here is a picture with normal and abnormal sperm. Notice the shape of the abnormal sperms head. This is our problem, these sperm cannot penetrate the egg.
So with this we were sent to a Fertility Specialist and Reproductive Endocrinologist named Dr. Gabriel Garzo from Reproductive partners http://ucsandiegofertility.com/. They have been nothing short of wonderful at RP and I couldn’t be more comfortable with our choice of Dr. and nurses.
I am not sharing this news with many people, just close friends and family of course. I don’t know how to explain the way it feels to not be able to get pregnant naturally. Shame, or embarrassment, I guess it a good way to describe it. It’s hard to talk about infertility with people because you will usually get some nonsense back. “Oh you just need to relax” or ” just go on vacation” or “it will happen when you stop trying”. Nope, people we have done all this and now we know why it didn’t work. Science…DH sperm just can’t get the job done without assistance. It’s as simple as that!
So within the next few weeks our journey will begin and I would like to share it with you! I will admit I am nervous, but know in my heart that this treatment will eventually give me the baby I so badly want to love with all my heart!
So let’s venture through this journey together!