How Do You Know?

Tell me this, how do you know if you are ready to  have baby #2?

It’s not like Shane and I can get pregnant the old-fashioned way but we do have 9 potential babies on ice at the fertility clinic.

It’s been almost a year now since we brought Kaili Sloan home and I couldn’t love a person more, but my pregnancy was very hard and if you asked  me to do it all over again  { I mean really? after all that I still couldn’t have an easy delivery?} I would definitely hesitate before saying “of course”, I know that sounds horrible! I don’t regret her for a moment and I would  go through it all again but if I knew then what I know now, I would have questions.

When we started the fertility treatments we assumed we would have more that one child, otherwise there is no reason to “pay rent” to store our embryos.  Shane and I talk about it but my answer was always “seriously? After what I just went through? Ask me in a year.” Well, here we are almost a year later and I feel the same way I did a year ago. Now I say “ask me in another year or two.” However we aren’t getting any younger, so we sort of want to know what way we are leaning. But how do you decide? How will I know that I am ready to put myself through all of that again?

Let’s put health aside, say I had a perfect pregnancy and delivery { like my fantasy birth plan} but say we like the ease of one child. I mean it’s so much easier to continue “doing” things with just one. Once we bring a #2 into the world our reality really changes and I got to say it’s pretty nice right now.  So I guess my question is, how do you make the decision of having another child? And what do you do if you regret the decision you make?

2 thoughts on “How Do You Know?

  1. Hey Kim! Since I recently had my 2nd child I will give you my 2 cents. First of all, you have to go with your gut and what timing is right for YOU. I didn’t have a difficult pregnancy or birth with my first and I didn’t even want to consider having a 2nd for at least 1 1/2 yrs after.
    Second of all, you may want to consider the age difference between your kids. As it turns out our first child is 2 1/2 yrs older (girl 1st, then a boy). We delt with some jealousy issues the first 3 months, but now she is in love with him. I’m happy I had at least 2 1/2 yrs between them because my daughter is much more independent at this age than she was a year ago. Independence really helps when you have those times that you really have to focus on the baby. She also loves to help with the baby (like fetching diapers, bottles, etc), AND she’s potty trained (only 1 kid in diapers).
    My husband and I both feel like the adjustment from 0 to 1 kid was easier than 1 kid to 2 kids…really! But, all in all, as you know its a lot of work but sooo worth it!
    Good luck with your decision! I hope I was able to give you some perspective. 🙂

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