Things I love about being a mom:

This beautiful face!

Getting her here was the hardest thing I have done and the proudest I have ever been.

Watching her eyes light up,  every little thing is a new adventure.

The way she wraps her legs tight around me when I hold her.

The way she picks a book, brings it to me and then climbs on my lap.

Her pure love of animals.

When you tell her to “be nice” she will give kisses!

Her laugh when I tickle her.

Watching her and her daddy. True love!

Knowing she is a pure and innocent part of half me and half Shane.

Her sense of humor, I don’t know if I should be proud or worried.

As amazing as being a mom is, there are some things I miss about my pre-kid life. Maybe it’s because I am solo during the week or maybe it’s completely normal…Some things we take for granted before we become parents, here are a few that I miss.

Things I miss now that I am a mom:

Sleeping pills. Some nights I just want to sleep sound and through the night.

Reading books during the day, in the sun.

Sleeping in on weekends and by sleeping in I mean at least until 7:30.

Taco Tuesdays, out of the house.

Daily gym time.

Completing simple tasks without being interuppted.

Lunch breaks. Alone! Very rarely am I all alone.

Although I miss these things, I don’t miss them as much as I love K bear. Some day I will get to do all these things again.

I am absolutely horrible at naming my blog posts. Trying to come up with a clever title seems easy enough but defeats me every time, dammit!

Today was a perfect 84 degrees, a mere 25 degrees cooler than Saturday.  With the nice weather change I thought it would be the perfect time to blow up Kaili’s frog pool she got from her birthday.  She seemed to get more enjoyment out of this pool than the other baby pool I got her a year ago. Maybe it was because the water out of the hose was warm and she wasn’t shivering. Or it was because big froggy eyes were peering down on her, yeah that was probably it.

After lounging in the water we ate lunch outside. Then I soaked up some sun while she “cooked” us up snacks and chased the cat around.

Did I tell you I saw my Neonatologist Dr. Stanco a month ago? I was advised by my fertility Dr. to sit down and talk to her about the risks of having another child.  After talking through everything that happened during my pregnancy she said “go for it!” She thinks that most of what happened to me were freak things. The subchorionic tear, the velementous cord insertion and the succenturiate lobe in my placenta are rare conditions and she doesn’t see them happening again. However the pre-term contractions could happen again so I would have to be monitored really closely and bed rest is a good possibly. Even though I was diagnosed with Pre-Eclampsia at the end of my pregnancy she wasn’t too concerned about that. She did advise that if I was going to do it, to do it soon.

I still haven’t quite recovered mentally from everything that happened. Even though I have now been told everything should be fine, the Drs. were wrong once. This time I have Kaili to think about and in the back of my mind I worry about something happening to me. I know, I know..Hopefully I can come to a final decision on what I want to do. Until then…

For all the women who have or are struggling through infertility here is a beautiful poem. I hope it gives you strength and hope.

Author: UnKnown

Thoughts Of Becoming A Mother

There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss and though they are good mothers and love their children, I know I will be better

I will be better not because of genetics or money or that I have read more books but because I have struggled and toiled for this child. I have longed and waited. I have cried and I prayed. I have endured and planned over and over again

Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams. I will notice everything about my child . I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover, I will marvel at this miracle everyday for the rest of my life

I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing that I can comfort, hold, and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me

I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child that my friends will not see

Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child God leads me to, I will not be careless with my love

I will be a better mother for all that I have endured. I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, a friend and a sister because I have known pain.

I know disillusionment as I have been betrayed by my own body. I have been tired by the fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall

I have prevailed
I have succeeded
I have won

So now, when others hurt around me I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs,

I listen

And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely. I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten, as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard. I have learn a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes

I have learn to appreciate life

Yes I will be a wonderful person

Sunday night Shane and I were able to celebrate our 6 year anniversary watching the closing ceremonies. The show was good and basically a Coldplay concert. I enjoyed this one more then Beijing’s, I think because I have a closer bond with David now. It really is amazing what these athletes do.

Our seats were pretty high up and although we could see everything it wasn’t close up. Most of these pictures show the amazing light show that went on. The music was great, Jay Z came and Rhianna collaborated with Coldplay, good stuff!

Monday afternoon after packing everything up we headed to the airport. I was expecting the flight to be rough with Kaili but I was pleasantly surprised. She got antsy a few time but she was SO tired she finally passed out and slept for a good amount of time. If you can believe it the flight home actually seemed faster then going there, even with a toddler.

She seemed a little disoriented when we got home but she finally went to bed just fine a few hours later. She woke up a couple of times during the night crying, I am sure she was confused on where she was. At 3 am her body told her it was time to get up so we sat on the couch with milk and watched some recorded episodes of Barney. She went back to sleep around 4:30 and woke up at her normal time, 6:30.

Tuesday afternoon we are heading to Old Town to celebrate again with Wags. Time to show off some medals and eat some real Mexican food.

Yesterday we set out about noon to watch Wags win the silver medal. He is leaving London with a gold and a silver medal, now that is an accomplishment!

After the medal ceremony we waited for Wags to gather himself a do the media thing then we met up with him for closer look at the medal and take pictures.

Next up dinner. We all got together at a Brazilian restaurant to celebrate. David was occupied by many fans wanting to congratulate him and get a glimpse of a true medal.

After dinner just Shane, Wags and I stayed out to catch up and get all the juicy details of what really goes on behind the scenes of the Paralympics.

We had fun. Wags was continuously mobbed by people wanting pictures and autographs. I don’t think he minded all the pretty ladies hanging around.

Tonight is the Paralympics closing ceremony. We only have 3 tickets so unfortunately not all of us can go and that is a big bummer.

Tomorrow is our flight home which is also a big bummer. Back to reality until 2016 when we do it all over again in Rio.

Today was David’s single match against Israel. He won 6-3 6-0.

Kaili had a great day. She was a happy girl all day. Shane finally got her to nap after David’s match and we were able to watch a few more matches.

 

News Flash!! Great Britain’s Peter Norfolk lost his match today. Peter has taken the gold medal in singles at both the Greece and Beijing Paralympics against David. Not this time!

Tomorrow David and Nick play team Great Britain for the gold medal. It is televised live here in London so hopefully you can catch it on You tube Paralympics channel, NBC online or maybe even BBC. Please watch if  you can!

 

 

 

 

This original Cooking Light recipe calls for a Salsa Verde  sauce and  great northern beans . This time I decided to try it with enchilada sauce and black beans and I was pleased. It’s an easy way get your Mexican food fix without blowing up the calories, and it can feed the family for days! However you decide to make it, green sauce or red, I know you will happy with the results.

*Recipe adapted from Cooking Light.

Ingredients

10 tablespoon reduced-fat sour cream

14 months later, we have ourselves a walker.

These stinkin molars have been a pain in her ass the past few days. Today she has had a low grade fever and no appetite but that didn’t stop her from trying out this walking thing. I may or may not have been luring her with the ball to get the video.