Summer Bucket List

~ Girlmom ~ 2 Comments

Seven more days and I am going  start thinking about checking off  a summer bucket list. First things first of course, I’ll have  to make sure I can walk around upright and poop without crying. I have been reminded that holding a pillow on the incision helps ease the pain, it’s also good when sneezing, just in case you are being cut open anytime soon.

Do you have a bucket list for this summer or the rest of the year?  I have a whole truckload of ideas, Shane thinks I am overzealous, we’ll see.

I saw this on Babble.

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A few of those aren’t much of a bucket list, more like life, and I can assure you I am not doing any sort of Triathlon, mini or not.

I am going to see how many tasting rooms I can get the baby into before Winter rolls around.

I am desperate for a bowl of good Gazpacho so I need a fool proof recipe for that.

I would like to get my backside some sun so it can catch up with my frontside.

Our newly refurbished home is begging for some wall art.

I want to take Kaili to the zoo so she can hang with her peeps.

I will find a babysitter who wants to and can handle two kids. One  that I can trust enough so I can actually leave the house.

I would like to go on a date with my husband while said babysitter watches the kids.

And maybe, maybe if the stars align, I will get to see Dave Matthews for our 8th anniversary. Or get to see the ponies run at Del Mar, or maybe both?

What is on your bucket list?

 

Calm Before the Storm

~ Girlmom ~ 1 Comment

A little more than a week out and I’m feeling unusually calm about bringing another baby home. Maybe it’s because I have successfully kept K from doom for 3 years and that makes number 2 seems like it will be a breeze. Or maybe it’s because I have no memory of the infant stage and don’t remember a damn thing. Shane asked if we needed to bring diapers to the hospital and I had no answer, “honestly I have no clue”, I told him ” I don’t think we did with Kaili.”

I also don’t have the fears I had last time. All those hours of bed rest pregnant with K  gave me plenty of time to come up with what-if scenarios, this time I just hope  baby A’s  lungs are developed enough to not see the NICU.

I still have a fear of losing Kaili. She called for me in the middle of the night last night. Shane got up and then all was quiet. I layed there awake wondering if her window was locked, worrying that some crazy person could climb in and take her from her room. Thinking about every person she came into contact with that day {<—craaaazy and I know it} Every creak I heard made me more and more paranoid so  I finally had to get up and take a peek at her. Irrational or not, it’s a fear I imagine will never go away.

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The baby swing has provided more entertainment then any of her toys ever have.

 

 

35 Week Bumpdate

~ Girlmom ~ 3 Comments

The countdown is officially on, 13 days until we meet the little human. I had my last ultrasound yesterday. We learned that she weighs about 5 lbs. 5 oz, has cute chubby cheeks and a head of hair. The scan was also one last chance to see if my placenta decided to move, it hasn’t.

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The foot that will score many goals in the future.

The days are moving along slowly but I’m not feeling too bad. Sleep comes in waves as does the nausea.

In soccer news, the USMNT has made it out of the group round and into knockout round. No one thought they could do it with the teams they were faced with. I’ve been lucky <–not the best word) enough to watch every match of the WC and catch all the drama, bloody heads and preschool antics. If you aren’t watching, you are disappointing your country and you should feel really bad about yourself.

Kaili has been handling my bed rest pretty good. It’s hard on me knowing it’s hard on her. Besides school, she is basically housebound with me. Trips to the park and play time in the hot tub help, but I swear, Shane built her this great play house area and it’s like she is allergic to playing alone. I told her that giving her a sister is the best gift we could ever give her. She likes to hug the belly and say hi to baby A, it’s pretty darn cute. Yesterday she told me she wants to get back in my belly to “try it out”…that kid.

On top of everything, her preschool is closing at the end of July. I am now in search of a new school that I can get her into by August 1st. I have an idea of a school nearby, fingers crossed they pass all the checklist questions and it will be a good fit. Trying to find a new school via the couch isn’t the way I had planned it going, as so is life and my pregnancies.

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What Should I Title This?

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Kaili was sitting on Shane’s lap playing nicely and then out of the blue she hit him. “Kaili, we don’t hit, do you need to go to your room?” “Yes,” replied Kaili. Then she stomped down the hallway and the slamming of her door followed. A minute later she came out smiling.

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Did you guys watch the USA game yesterday? The range of emotions I felt during that 95 minutes was unreal.

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As I mentioned all I want to eat are desserts. Delicious decadent heavenly desserts. I saw a commercial for Sonic’s milkshakes, I have only been to a Sonic once in my life and it was on a road trip. Never need to go back but when I saw the commercial I could have sent Shane to the nearest one at that moment, they looked so good. Then I saw a picture of a coconut cream pie, are you kidding me? But then this recipe happened on Pinterest. I guess it’s been awhile since I looked for instant pudding but I don’t remember seeing coconut pudding before. This recipe definitely needs to be tested.

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I have had some contractions again the past couple of days, they seem innocent enough for now. I found this picture I took on one of the days I was at Triage. It’s probably hard to imagine what a contraction looks like on paper, so I thought I would share.

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We are officially under 20 days until we get to meet the baby. I am trying to go over all of the things I need for baby A. I am reusing everything of Kaili’s for the most part.  Going over some lists, I see I am missing a few things. If you have any suggestions for items that I could use, please indulge.

Home Sweet…

~ Girlmom ~ 10 Comments

I was sent home from the hospital and now it’s a day by day, let’s see what happens situation. “Let’s have you get some time at home, in your own bed in case you have to come back, we are just buying time.” was how the Dr. put it. .

The contractions have subsided for the most part, for now. I continue on the meds and I am on bed rest with bathroom privileges. I’m trying to keep it together but going through this all over again is crappy and SO much harder with a 3 year old.

Heres to hoping my body can hold out until 36 weeks. If the contractions come back then I go back to the hospital. They will try to get them to stop but I am not sure how much effort will be put into it and if they don’t stop then we will go ahead and have a baby.

Now I get to sit and watch Shane get the baby stuff together, the carseat installed, cook, do the laundry and take care of the kid. Most of you might think, “how nice.” But it’s really not. Having to sit and feel useless is depressing, lonely and the time moves oh.so.slowly. But having a husband who is handling it all so well makes it easier and takes some stress away.

So now what? Besides watch soccer, which has been a lifesaver, and entertain a kid on the couch, anyone have ideas to pass the time?

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Sleepless and Can’t Think Of a Title

~ Girlmom ~ 5 Comments

You know how you feel after a peaceful, long and uninterrupted nights sleep? Well that is NOT how I felt this morning!
My contractions weren’t obeying the meds yesterday, so the doc upped both the nifedipine and magnesium dosage. That did the trick and by midnight I was off the monitors and left alone for some sleep that never came. At 3 am I was put back on the monitors and given more meds and the gift I got was a screaming headache. This went on all night. I think I got about 3 hours of broken sleep.
Every hour that more magnesium pumped through my veins the worse I felt. It makes me feel like I have the flu with a horrible headache, dizziness and a lump in my throat threatening to deliver my latest meal all over the bed. I was also having a hard time reading, everything was blurry and At one point I watched the walls breathing. Timothy Leary called and wants his drugs back.

The nurses seemed concerned with the high dosage I was on and then when I stopped chatting and had an ice pack covering my eyes, they stopped the IV drip and called the doc to have the dose lowered. I swear, within minutes I felt better.
It was perfect timing too because soon Shane and Kaili came to visit. I also had a visit from the doc saying they will rid me of this horrid drug at 5:30. They will monitor me over night to see how I do. Hopefully I can leave soon.
Tonight’s FaceTime with Kaili left us both in tears and Shane told me she asked to go to bed so she could wake up and see me. Are you crying yet, cause I am.
Is it really too much to ask to have a normal pregnancy? My new nurse just asked if I was going to be here until delivery, since my uterine scar and the previa are such a danger…I said I hope not. I want to be home with my loves, even if it’s in bed for the next 4 weeks. But I also don’t want to be put in an emergency situation again. If I go home and start bleeding, that exactly what will happen. I hate this! I guess we will see what the next day has in store.

Would You Rather

~ Girlmom ~ 3 Comments

Well, I made it 4 weeks longer this pregnancy. I was really hoping to skip the early hospital stay this time but alas here I am.
Last night I was getting contractions but this time they were coming while I was resting and they were 10 minutes apart. I hoped after a nights sleep they would go away and they did. By early afternoon they were back and coming consistently. The emotions hit me, maybe I knew what was going to happen if I went to triage but I hoped for the best.
When I got there things moved fast, I was strapped up to the monitors and talking to the nurse within minutes. The contractions were coming every 3 to 4 minutes and this is on the nifedipine. She called the doctor and the doctor said…” No more contractions while you’re in that bed!” Okay no he didn’t say that.

Dr. Saffer is the doc that is always on duty when I come in. Even when I was admitted with Kaili, it was him who tended to me. He probably thinks I’m stalking him. He sat down, told me what a predicament I am and then gave me 2 options. Would you rather, go upstairs now ( be admitted) and have an IV drip of magnesium to see if we can knock these out or take the chance of going home. Then he said that if I go home and things get worse, if contractions get stronger or i have any bleeding that I will be admitted and will stay until the delivery. Choosing option A was a no brainer, although I cried like a baby for a few minutes.

Hours later I find myself in a decent hospital room, IV in my left arm, blood pressure cuff on my right. 3 nurses took turns trying to get my IV in, they all failed. Did you know that some hospitals have an IV unit? They are masters of the IV and they go room to room sticking needles in people. Well I got close and personal with them today when the nurse called them to put my IV in. I was impressed, it as quick and painless. The nurses really should just let the IV unit do it the first time instead of poking the patients numerous times before giving up. I’m still fascinated with the whole IV unit thing, what a strange job, and if it’s their job why are nurses doing it at all? Anyways…..

I am on a drip of magnesium that should knock out these contractions within 24 hours. The first couple hours I could already tell a difference, they were shorter and less uncomfortable. But it didn’t last, they are back and I just knocked out 8 in 30 minutes. The nurse gave me a double dose of nifedipine and now we wait. I don’t feel so hot but not nearly as bad as I remember feeling when I went through this with K.
There is so much more going on, monitors, water intake and outtake if you catch my drift. Baby will be monitored every 6 hours which means at 1:00a.m. I will be woken up, if I’m asleep.

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A Week in Photos

~ Girlmom ~ 1 Comment

Someone has been working on their tracing.

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This month was our dinner theme, cuisine Française.

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The kids are all growing up. Next month we will be adding 2 more munchkins to this group.

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Despite the cards in her hands, she has become quite the Memory queen.

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Well played Dentist, well played.

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Finally 1 year later, she is able to reach the peddles.

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Uncle Wags came home from a long run of tourneys and came bearing gifts.

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There was also a USA soccer jacket thrown in for me. Tomorrow the World Cup starts, are you excited?

32 Week Bumpdate

~ Girlmom ~ 4 Comments

Gosh, I feel so boring. I don’t have much to share  these days. I had another trip to triage on Monday, only because the Dr. told me to go, I probably would have put it off. I instantly regretted that decision as soon as I saw how crowded it was. Reminder, women seem to have the most issues on Mondays…check. After a long chat with the nurse while being monitored, I was sent home with my medication dosage moved up. Exactly what I thought would happen, it’s like I’m psychic .

The next day was my Dr. appt. and it was decided that I should have another FFN test done and a cervical length check, “just to be on the safe side”, which I have now heard multiple times. It’s a good thing I guess. You know what else I have heard 100,000,000 times? Okay maybe not that many times but any time someone in the medical field looks at my stomach, I always get asked where the vertical scar came from. Then I tell them the story and the responses range from “Oh ya, I remember hearing about that” to ” Oh wow, that must have been scary.”  When the ultrasound is done to check the cervix, I get the pleasant, “Oh, there is your placenta right there, good thing we didn’t do a manual cervical check.” Like they’re surprised to see that I still have the previa. . Oh you know what else the nurse asked me as she was doing the FFN test? “Is this your last baby?” “Hell ya” I said. She said she thought that was  probably a good idea. I couldn’t agree more.

Results came back and all looks good. What does that mean? Nothing. I am now on modified bed rest, basically sitting when I can. It seems these contractions aren’t doing much, but they could, so I learned nothing. Try to take it easy, go to triage if I don’t stop contracting, take the medication that doesn’t do shit. Check, check and checkity check.

I got my C-section packet to fill out before surgery. Just a little light reading before the big day.

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The triage nurse asked me if I had any religious issues with receiving blood since Previa patients sometimes require a blood transfusion, we can skip the gruesome details. I said no, but I should have said told her that I won’t except blood from racists or homophobes, wouldn’t want that shit to spread and all. I could throw a few more in there but I wouldn’t want to offend anyone.

That is how I spent my fun filled week, jealous are you? Some days are better than others, emotionally and physically but I am hanging in there.

 

 

Because

~ Girlmom ~ 4 Comments

I think I have held up pretty well emotionally this time around, considering the last time. I don’t know if it’s because the contractions are coming back, if it’s because the delivery is around the corner or if it’s just the hormones but I am starting to come unglued. I am snapping at my kid for the littlest things and I wanted to grab on to the hubs leg and beg him not to go to work this week, like I did with my dad when I was little. All the while I am doing my best not to burst into tears.

It’s clear the meds aren’t working, I’m not even feeling the side effects anymore. I spent all of Sunday debating with myself if I should go to triage or just wait until Monday, ya know just to see if they go away. I am hoping they tell me to up my dosage, maybe that will buy me a week, at least. The doctors office is supposed to have an after hours nurse on call however I haven’t had any luck reaching anyone.

I’m also feeling some anxiety about the c-section. I wonder if they can sedate me before they wheel me into the OR…I am afraid I will have a racing pulse and look like a sweaty convict. I will talk to the doc about it but in the meantime can we all think good thoughts that nothing dramatic happens again.

Anyway, changing subjects…I have had two pillows on the floor next to Kaili’s bed since she was falling out of it nightly.  It’s been awhile since that has happened so I asked her if I could take them away, she said yes. In true fashion I forgot to move them. Before heading to bed myself, I went into check on her and found her curled up on those pillows on the floor, she even had her blanket on her. I wish I had taken a picture because it was really cute. I can only assume she put herself there, why, I have no idea. Anyhow, those pillows are still on the ground.

Quick, get some stuff done, Peppa Pig is on! Peppa is the choice of cartoons around here and when she says “it’s a bit cold mummy” I wonder if she is going to pick up the British accent.

She is starting to push it in the attitude department. Her favorite thing to say to me is “stop it mommy!” That is her response to anything I say,  “because” is her next favorite word. “Kaili, why are you climbing on the counters? “Because.” “Why are you eating chaptstck?” “Because…STOP it mommy!!”

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